My partner and I were adamant that the one thing we wanted to do during our week long holiday in Lanzarote was to go to the Music Hall Tavern in Puerto del Carmen due to comments made by friends and family that it was “the best night ever”.
I was aware prior to booking, from reviews on here, that the food was not of fantastic quality but that was really the least of our worries……
We travelled there by coach which was met by staff from the Music Hall who guided us to the venue where we had our pictures taken with two of the “ladies” prior to entering. I have to say, the “ladies” we met were absolutely amazing – Leona and Courtney – so welcoming and so convincing (to the point where I actually asked my other half if they were girls or fellas – I’ll not give you his response, lol).
This was the highlight of our night….
Upon paying our balance to reception (a rather steep €40 per person) we were then seated by a member of the waiting staff (no choice in where you sit inside the venue). She ushered us to a table where 8 other people we had never met before were also sitting and to the two very front seats, closest to the stage. Now when I say closest to the stage, I mean practically sitting on the stage, right smack bang in the middle! My other half (and I), despite being extremely open minded, felt quite uncomfortable where we were and so, as there were a huge amount of seats left all over the venue with others still to be seated, I politely asked the girl who seated us if we could be moved to seats nearer to the back. I was very bluntly and rudely told that “all the other seats are reserved” and that she “would see what she had left at the end, once everyone else was seated”. Now, forgive me, but I didn’t see one reserved sign and it just so happened that a couple right before us had asked to be moved and were facilitated with no issues. I returned to my seat feeling rather embarrassed and informed my other half who was none too pleased. That kind of put us out of sorts slightly and, having discussed that we wouldn’t really be in the mood anymore to enjoy the show after this experience, we upped and left, informing staff at reception of our issue and requesting a refund.
The bar manager was then called who then arranged for us to sit at two seats closer to the back (of which there were many left). We decided then that we would make the best of it and got to know the other lovely people at our table (if it weren’t for these lovely folks our night would have been a total disaster).
Then it was time for dinner…..
Starter – luke warm soup of some kind (hard to tell as there wasn’t much flavour) with stale bread – 2/10
Main – A bird of some description (as the lighting was so low it was hard to tell if it was pigeon or chicken), four baby potatoes with some veg. Very dry and hard to palate – 1/10
Dessert – Profiteroles. 10/10 (simply because I love profiteroles so it wouldn’t matter to me if they were simply defrosted)
All in all, a terrible meal. We were glad we had eaten a little before we came.
Then it was time for the show…..
We waited….and waited….and waited….and waited. Then we were told that they were having some “computer difficulties” and would have the show on the road as soon as possible. So we waited….and waited….and waited some more.
Then came the audience singalong of the 2012 version of “why are we waiting?”, a lot of groaning and very cross faces. We were again told that they were doing their best to get the show up and running and took assistance from a guy at our table who happened to be a computer engineer.
Whilst we waited, one of the ladies came on stage and did a “how are you, where are you from” thing with the audience. We appreciated the effort but it was very strained, not very funny and certainly not appropriate for children.
This led to more silence, lights being turned off and on, and more singing from the audience. We weren’t offered a free drink nor given very much explanation and if you had wanted to purchase a drink, you had to wait for one of the only two waiting staff to get round to you so it was no use trying to get drunk to pass the time because you simply couldn’t! (You weren’t allowed to go to the bar yourself)
Our computer engineer friend finally did the trick and the curtains opened. By this time there was a queue around the tavern from reception with people requesting a refund. We too joined the queue whilst watching the mediocre miming renditions of a few of the “ladies” to three songs before taking their bows and leaving. So did we. Our bus was leaving at the pre-requisite time despite the delay in the show.
So, all in all, a bitter disappointment. It was the one thing I was looking forward to most during our holiday and my biggest let down. I have to applaud the “ladies” who did come out – they did fantastically in the face of disaster so well done to them but we will not be returning.
Oh and one last thing ….. where was the headliner, TT???
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